The truth of the matter...

Good morning!  Hope that your week is going well.  It's been a good long while since my last blog post.  I could tell you that I've been super busy and swamped and that would be true, but not any more true than at any other time of the year.  The truth of the matter is that I've just been trying to wrap my mind around the possibility that I just won't be able to compete in the Monumental Marathon on Saturday.  As those of you who read know, I've been training for this marathon since March.  On 10/14 I was chased by three dogs on a long run and while I did out sprint them I ended up tweaking my left calf/foot.  What I thought was a tweak turned out to be a bit more than that and I've been resting it.  Yesterday, I ran for the first time in two weeks.  I ran four miles again this morning.  It's clear that my leg is better, but not close to 100%.

Running is such a gift.  I love it.  It helps me process my life, it helps me make better decisions, and it helps me become less stressed.  When I'm able to run, there is much more balance in my life.  Because I know this, I'm extremely concerned about running a marathon on a left leg that is better but does not seem completely healed.  In 2008 I entered the Eugene Marathon with a nagging knee and hip issue.  I ran my best time ever, a 2:48.  However, I spent the remainder of 2008 and the first three months of 2009 rehabbing my leg.  I was miserable and at the time I remember wondering if it was all worth it.  I was not sure if I would ever be able to run pain free again.  It was awful, I was in a state of disarray, and I was not easy to be around. I told my friend Kevin to knock me on the side of the head if I ever decided to run another marathon.

In our lives we all go down roads that are not good from time to time and we often look back and regret not stopping when we had a chance.  Personally, I've had those moments when I know that I'm in a tough spot and I so desperately want to go back to the point when I had a choice to make a different decision.  Unfortunately, in this life we don't have a rewind button and most of the time what's done is done and you have to live with it and adjust.  Right now at this very moment, I feel like I'm at the point where I still have a choice and don't have to go in a direction that is extremely risky.  Yet, I so desperately want to go down the risky road.  It's really either risk a long term injury to run in a marathon or keep running lightly and let my calf and left leg heal fully.  To the non-runner I'm sure that this seems like a no brainer.  For this runner, though, it's a tough choice.  A really tough choice. 

Fortunately, I have two more days to decide what to do and I have the best medical team in house.  Yes, Sarah is back in Indianapolis.  Myles and I went to Atlanta last weekend to get her.  As you can imagine we had a great time in Atlanta visiting her and family and now we are ecstatic that she's back in Indianapolis!  And...she gives great advice and I typically end up in a great place when I follow it.  Happy running to you...